Assertive Communication Works

By Zoe Smith


It is impossible to live in this world and not be in contact with another person. As such, it is of vital importance that we develop good communication skills to be able to express ourselves clearly and in doing so, establish better relationships with the people around us. What is assertive communication and how can we use this to our best advantage?

There are a few styles of communication that people knowingly or unknowingly use. Passive and Aggressive communication styles are born out of low self esteem. Passive communicators avoid self expression at any cost; and aggressive ones go overboard in defending their rights and opinions by being almost abusive. Some individuals belong to the passive-aggressive category, which is by subtly undercutting people because they themselves feel powerless, jealous and angry.

It goes without saying that these are not very good communication styles. In fact, if you think this is you, you need to seriously check yourself and purpose to change before you lose people's respect or drive them away. Nobody is perfect and unless you can walk on water and are born of a virgin-expect to make mistakes. Learn from it and move on from here.

It goes without saying that the most effective communicator is the assertive communicator. Assertive people are people that have a healthy self-image, therefore they are able to advocate their rights and opinions without having to undermine another person to do so. They are open, direct and respectful to people they are with.

Being an assertive communicator will positively impact your professional life. Decision making techniques necessitate that one be self-possessed, honest and straightforward for maximum efficacy. Passive personalities will not command respect, and aggressive decision makers are likely to be overbearing and offensive to other people. Assertive decision makers solicit confidence and inspire his/her team to work towards the fulfillment of the goal.

Assertive communication will also help you have better relationships in your personal life as well. Many times we do not want to hurt a loved one's feelings and in doing so, become detrimental to their growth as individuals. Being able to tell them in a respectful and loving manner things that can be improved upon will make for a better bond and a stronger relationship.

So how can we improve in this particular quality? The first thing you need to do is to have a deeper understanding and appreciation of yourself. If you have a healthy self-image or self esteem, you will not shy away from asserting your rights; nor will you feel the need to strongly defend yourself because you feel vulnerable and attacked. Place a high and healthy value on your own person by taking time to develop yourself spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically.

A healthy self image results in good self esteem. When you are happy with yourself, you won't be shy about your own opinions; nor will you be defensive and be on attack mode when somebody disagrees with your views. Make it a priority to develop your spiritual, emotional and mental condition to enjoy a higher level of existence and quality of living. But even if we do all this, we cannot help it if other people misunderstand us. Miscommunication is a staple in life so do not be upset when it happens. Do the right thing regardless and don't be defined by what other people think or say. Live well and enjoy all the richness that life has to offer you-you will be glad you did.




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