How Positive Affirmation Can Produce Beneficial Change

By Sharida Kuiken


You've read all the self-help books: Attitude is everything! Change your perspective! Have a positive outlook! Can these ideas really change your future? And if so, how? In my childhood and adolescence, I was skeptical. Let's fact it, if my brother was born without being able to walk, how could my attitude or outlook change anything?As I got older I continued to reflect on a youth seemingly filled with disappointments and doubts. In talking to my friends and family, I realized I wasn't alone, we've all experienced them. Then, I started taking a good, long look at myself and my feelings. I realized that my deepest feelings were the ones guiding me forward, challenging me to reach to the depth of what I was able to feel - happy or sad. In the end, these feelings allowed me to explore all dimensions of my being.

Affirmation on the other hand will make those subconscious thoughts conscious because you will be aware of them. And, when you start thinking conscious positive thoughts, you will be more aware which negative thoughts are threatening to take over. This is because we create what we think.This is an interesting phenomenon because if you're not aware of your negative thoughts, it could be sabotaging for you. Ninety percent of what you are thinking about gets carried over the next day's 52,000 thoughts so if you're thinking negative, you are bound to think negative thoughts and will never get you out of your rut. And yet, since affirmation means saying something positively, your statements will assert what you want to be true and change your mind set.

Since all of our inner conversation and that entire self-talk are streams of affirmations, we continually create our own experience based on the subconscious flow of those words and thoughts. Some of these thought patterns we have developed must have worked well for us since childhood but many of them are sabotaging us from getting what we really want. Remember that, what we think is the reflection of our inner beliefs and many of them are based on inappropriate impressions we have created as children. These behavioral patterns are used by our subconscious to quickly and easily respond to everyday events which is essential to our survival.

If at first your affirmations feel awkward, forced or phony - that's good! Any feelings of discomfort means that you're stepping out of your comfort zone (fear), you're creating inner change and ruffling the feathers of your ego self, who wants to keep you safe. Safety to the ego self is maintaining the status quo - no changes allowed. So please appreciate what's really happening and use it as fuel to gain momentum; you can use the feelings and thoughts about your discomfort to create a new, empowering affirmation for yourself! The discomfort will dissolve once you get into a daily rhythm and develop some confidence. Do it anyways. At the beginning of your exercises, don't worry about whether you believe your affirmations or not, the effectiveness is in the repetition. Belief in your statements will develop as a result of the repetition and meaning you give your affirmations, so choose wisely. Any resistance that you experience, including thoughts about what nonsense all this new age stuff is, are excuses to keep you safe and free from change. Resistance is also an opportunity for you to break out of the conditioned responses of the past - try being open and see the opportunity in learning something new about yourself; you may be pleasantly surprised at what you discover inside!

Get clear and get motivated. The clearer your visions and the greater the motivation, the better your chances will be of success in achieving your goals. Get all the components of your ideal life down on paper and be bold in your dreams - amass a mountain of reasons about why you must accomplish your goals; write down all of what it will cost you if you don't pursue your vision and all the joy that will result from their achievement. Put your goals and reasons in point form on a 3" x 5" recipe card and read it often; before bed, upon waking and throughout the day. Create affirmations that show these goals and capture the zest of your motivations, and move yourself towards your goals with a plan to realize it. Take any and all action that you think will take you a step closer to what you desire.And let go of "how" it's going to happen; that's out of your jurisdiction so don't waste any time fretting, worrying or stewing about "how" or "what if" - your Higher Power has your back so learn to trust, go with the flow and enjoy the ride!

I am abundant! I am loved.Applying An Affirmation.Make the laws of affirmation work in your life. Let's focus for a moment on the "word" aspect of this equation. The words I am are a very powerful tool. "I AM" tells the universe to put the wheels of energy in motion. These two words trigger the universe and let it know you are ready to receive your prayer.

For women, challenging some of the old cultural/tribal beliefs is particularly revealing and empowering as it affects change not only within ourselves, but also has a trickle down effect for new generations. As we challenge, release and replace old limiting beliefs about the roles women were historically assigned to play, we live and teach the new beliefs to those that come after us. For example, a tribal belief within my family and heritage was that the men were the breadwinners and the women were the housekeepers... for a woman to be happy, she had to find and marry "a good man" who would provide her with security, a nice home and a certain level of comfort; and in exchange, she would raise the kids, cook, clean and manage the household. This formula is great if that's what you want; however, in this family, a lesbian career woman with no interest in raising children would experience a certain amount of conflict between the traditional family beliefs and her personal desires.The payoff in challenging old beliefs is that we discover that it is our power of decision that liberates us from the restrictions of the past and it is our power of decision now that creates a new future to our liking. And limiting beliefs about traditional feminine roles contain great material for creating positive affirmations for women to work with in manifesting the results they desire - usually, what we desire is pretty much the opposite of the belief we want to drop, so use the old belief and reword it for the positive outcome you desire.

It is important to realize that all things exist in some form. The money you need is out there. The perfect person you wish you could spend your whole life with is somewhere, just waiting to meet you. The tools you need for learning exist, and so do the people you need to meet. When you stop to think about this, it makes the idea of lack seem utterly preposterous.In order to use affirmations properly, it is important to know what you want. Spend some time thinking about your desires and work on framing your affirmative statements in a manner that will be most powerful. Do not use any negating statements that talk about what you do not wish to have. Think and speak in completely positive terms.

The second advantage to affirming as if the outcome has already been achieved is because it makes it easier to emotionally connect with your goals, and emotionally charging your affirmations is the secret ingredient to outstanding results. This might be a bit of a challenge initially, particularly if you find yourself feeling any discomfort as outlined in point #1, or if you've shut yourself down from experiencing strong emotion, but it will really super-charge your results if you can immerse yourself in the feelings, emotions and sensations of the results you want contained in your affirmations. Simple repetition is effective in itself, but the added element of powerful, strong and positive emotion will speed up your results considerably. Don't worry if your feelings don't seem authentic, keep at it, be persistent and you'll enjoy the sweet rewards of your faith and perseverance.When practicing positive affirmations, for women or within any distinct group, being aware of the customary or habitual roles we've identified with in that group will help us to free ourselves from the restrictions of those roles and aid us in re-defining ourselves to better express and enjoy who we are in truth. Applying the 5 key points of being persistent and consistent to give ourselves the best chance at success; of having faith in your vision by doing it even when you feel uncomfortable because you understand positive change is taking place; of being crystal clear about your goals and amassing mountains of reasons to keep you on course and propel yourself through the tough times; of courageously challenging outworn and outdated beliefs that hold us back and reclaiming our power from them; and affirming as though your goal is a done deal to give your dreams emotional fuel and vitality will give your affirmations weight and authority to power yourself into a future of your own deliberate creation. No one else will do this for you, and taking command of your thoughts, visions and emotions is a potent gift to yourself - enjoy your new powerful and positive results!




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